Monday, August 24, 2009

My weight

I'm struggling somewhat with my weight right now, after having a very low appetite at the end of pregnancy, I think in part due to a squashed stomach, I didn't really have any fat stores laid down. Once Grace was born I became very hungry and ate to that hunger, the pounds piled on. The first few weeks I was not very active but at the 6 week mark I gradually started exercising.

Unfortunately weight gain is a common side effect of one of the drugs I'm taking to combat my depression, as far as I can tell this seems to be partly due to increased appetite, but also due to altered metabolism.

I haven't been weighing myself, so I'm not sure if I've stabilised or maybe am even still gaining, I'm definitely not losing! The diet I'm eating, combined with the exercise I do and the breastfeeding really should be putting me on a path of slow weight loss, but it isn't and that's frustrating and is definitely impacting my self esteem.

What I really need to do is to exercise more whilst being careful not to increase my calorific intake, but it's hard to find the time to do that, I'm really not keen on putting Grace in the gym daycare, so even when the older kids are back in school, it's not going to be easy. I can do strength and stretching activities at home, but it's much harder to do the cardiovascular that I really need. Getting up early in the mornings to work out just isn't going to happen, the negative impact on the rest of my day is just too much. Evenings aren't easy either, I already do dance class on Monday nights and some weeks a private lesson another night, add in other random activities that pop up continually plus Grace's desire to nurse almost constantly in the evenings, then it just ain't gonna happen.

So I feel rather stuck, we're starting to wean off the drug that's contributing to this, but even if I get off it sucessfully and weight loss becomes a little easier, I still have a lot to lose.

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