I finished watching the movie "Pregnant in America" and it turned out to be just what I needed. I really feel like I was at a place where everything was about fear, just right now, even if it's only temporary I'm reminded exactly why I want to do this birth naturally - because it is the best thing for mother and baby. Also, why that for me means trying to do it at home, because it gives me the best chance of doing that, without, in my opinion, taking any unnecessary risks.
For the first time, I can even visualise natural birth in a hospital, if that is what turns out to be needed for either me or the baby. That's a really exciting place to be, as until now I had basically felt that if there was any circumstance that pushed us that way, that it would mean a c-section and it's great to feel free of that.
One tool I plan to use to help us acheive this is Hypnobabies, I need to go check their website as to when to order the CDs and start working through the program, I think it's pretty soon!