Tuesday, June 22, 2010

pain isn't interesting

This is partially a moan, but also just an observation.

The world of blogs reflects real life, the most read blogs are either on popular topics or very well written. When you narrow it down to health related topics, it's very revealing.

If you get cancer, or your kid gets cancer, you are carrying a baby with a fatal diagnosis - bad stuff, horrible stuff that I wouldn't wish on anyone - and you blog about it, whether you already had a blog or not, then people read it and people comment on it and if you are blessed with the skill of writing then you may have more followers than you ever imagined. I don't begrudge anyone any of those followers, but it reveals a truth that dicing with death is something that interests a lot of people.

I've followed blogs of unborn babies with fatal diagnoses, but once that baby has died, after a few weeks it undeniably drops lower down my list of things to read if I have time, but the grief isn't gone for the blogger, it's only just beginning. The statistics reveal that I'm not the only one.

Joints that need surgery are a lot more interesting than joints that don't, pain that comes from a dramatic accident is more interesting than pain from other sources.

My hip pain is boring, so boring that I'm bored of it, I rarely talk about it and I've got so used to it that as long as it remains within some boundaries I forget about the adaptations I've made and the things I don't do, but now I realise the consequences of that aren't great, I've not been thankful for the many things I have been able to do recently, but I've also been neglectful, it's not news to me that my body needs more than just time to recover from pregnancy and a c-section, I knew I needed to do physical therapy and I can't just blame the fact that I didn't on depression.

If I bother to listen, I know my body an awful lot better than I've been acting recently. To have a flare up of pain in my hip that other than immediately post surgery is the worst I've had since surgery or even in the year before it is not something I could have predicted, but I could have and should have predicted that something would happen, that the relative well being of my joints, muscles and ligaments was not because I was managing my body well.

Getting to a point where I needed crutches to get to the bathroom has presented me with a much bigger task to get to a manageable place because now I don't just have to deal with muscle weakness and imbalance with a moderate amount of pain thrown in, I know have to do it with severe pain and I also have to find someone who can help me do that, there are a lot of physical therapists around, but they all have areas they are more experienced in and hypermobility, hips and postpartum isn't something I currently have a good contact for, the best I did work with has relocated!

Saturday, May 15, 2010

speech recognition

This is typed using Microsoft speech recognition. I am trying to teach myself have to use it. I also have to teach my computer hard to understand me. Which is why there are a you must eight and there's. That was supposed to say mistakes. I am not correcting anything other than what I can correct using the voice commands I already know and I'm very impressed with this sentence. You to the use speech recognition to navigate not just dictate but I can practice better by dictating.

Unfortunately there are some commands and that I made accidentally then don't know how to stop them and have done some random things. I think I will use the mouse to publish this post rather than risk losing it.

Today we went to discovery and the tide was and there were some naturalists helping children find animals in the tide pools. We saw crabs, snail eggs, an anemone, starfish and lots of other things. We got all wet and sandy but despite not really planning and we seem to have survived without too much mass. That should say mess not mass.

Tonight sausage boy and I plan to go to a dancing show, I'm feeling tired but hopefully I will be able to keep my eyes open. At the moment dictation is slower than typing I think it will be worth practicing.

Friday, May 14, 2010


After a mild winter, we seemed to have a wet and cold spring, never being quite sure if we really were going to have a winter without snow, or if that frost was the last one, but finally, I think we can be confident of no more frost, plants will survive! This week has given us a brief hint of summer, but the forecast seems to be rain rain rain, other than tomorrow, which is supposed to be nice and we plan to join a walk around some tide pools.

Birthday season is about to hit us with great force, it begins on Monday with Banana Girl's "summer" birthday, her preschool class make sure each child gets to celebrate, so her June birthday is actually going to be celebrated on Monday, meaning we have to take a special snack, almost inevitably cupcakes.

Surprisingly no one has pronounced a desire to receive any specific present, other than Grace quite obviously desiring balls that are hers and can't be grabbed from her by big sister (well, they could still be grabbed, but at least not proclaimed as "mine").

Grace is walking all over the place, she's such a tiny thing, it looks really odd, Sausage Boy was similar, but he was at least a month older when he walked. She seems to be having a harder time with teething than we've experienced before and she's done the odd thing of having her top lateral incisors appear before her top central incisors, though she did follow the classic bottom central incisors first thing.

I've been baby proofing and have discovered there are some horrible things out there, but also a few rather nifty and relatively ok looking gadgets, which are of course rather more pricey! I also finally bought a mirror to put on the headrest of the seat her car seat is strapped to, she must have been more predictable, or just screamed to tell me she was awake or something, but I was finding I was asking Sausage Boy quite often whether she was asleep or awake, or having to get out of the car in the rain to check. She doesn't transfer at all, or nap reliably at home, so if she's asleep and I have flexibility, I'll use it, which sometimes means parking the car and reading or knitting whilst she sleeps!

Monday, May 10, 2010

"The Book Group"

I just stumbled across this TV show on hulu.com, it's a British comedy, originally aired on Channel 4 eight years ago. I'm glad I missed it then, so many bits of it just wouldn't have made sense.

I only even clicked on it because the thumbnail had a picture of an actress from "Green Wing", also available on hulu, an utterly bizarre comedy set in a hospital, which originally aired in 2004 and 2006.

The setup is an American in Glasgow who starts a book group, the American is played by Anne Dudek, who played a doctor applying to join the team in "House MD". Eight years ago neither actress was familiar to me, a show full of completely new faces is harder to get into (for me, at least), nor had I much experience of the US and had barely visited Scotland.

Eight years is more than a quarter of my life, it's two thirds of my adult life, but it's not long enough ago to make the show seem dated, it just makes me a different viewer.

It wasn't exactly a major plot element, but an ongoing thread about the drinking of tea tickled me no end, I could see if the other way around, Anne Dudek's character simply didn't know how to respond to putting the kettle on and drinking tea and I know that feeling, it's striking how different a social event is, or even a professional contact is when it doesn't begin with making tea of coffee together, it's not just the drinking of it, but the making of it, there's something about standing in the kitchen, waiting for the kettle to boil, it changes the whole dynamic.

It also gives a purpose to a social interaction, it's much less threatening to invite someone over for a cup of tea than over for a chat.

There appear to be two series of 6 episodes each, presumably twelve books, the first being "On the Road", by Jack Kerouac, which I haven't read, I've heard of it, but barely, it seems to make top 100 lists, whether they be of the twentieth century, or the English language in general. Whenever I see one of these lists, I seem to have read more than average, but started and not completed about as many as I actually have read and most of those before I ever saw such a list - so I didn't start them to "score points", though I'm not sure why I did, though why I failed to complete them is potentially an equally significant aspect of my personality. Apparently if you bear with the nonsense language of "A Clockwork Orange", it makes sense in the end, but after chapter one I gave up! So I suspect I could be a 0/12 on if I've read any of the books they are discussing.

Maybe it will inspire me to read more, to try one of the books they discuss, or then again, maybe not, I prefer to laugh than to read "seminal works", I even had to look up what seminal actually means, then laugh at myself for having spent 15+ years knowing what a seminal vesicle does, but not noticed that seminal and semen are derived from the same root - which explains why I'm not particularly hot when it comes to languages!

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Postcards and blessings project

Sausage Boy and I have come up with a rather ambitious plan, we're going to try and send a postcard to someone in every state in the USA and hopefully receive one from each state too.

The idea is that we want to bring a smile to someone's face, or rather to lots of peoples' faces, we don't want to do a simple exchange, you send me one, I'll send you one, though if we link up with children who do want to do that, it would be great, but instead learn the blessing that an unexpected postcard or note can bring and practice that ourselves.

I chose the states of the USA as our target as an opportunity to learn some geography too! So now we need to get started, but we don't know many people in the USA, so if you have a friend or family member the could do with a smile right now, then please let me know and we'll send something to them very soon!

Monday, May 3, 2010


Banana Girl has discovered the suffix "ish" and it's rather fun to hear what words and concepts she is applying it to. Playish is a common feeling around here recently, it seems to specifically apply to board games, so "I'm feeling playish" means "Will you play snakes and ladders with me?". Being in the US, it's actually chutes and ladders, with appropriate pictures, which she calls slides and ladders, which sounds most peculiar.

Another one is crawlish, I've only heard it once, but it seemed very appropriate, Grace was sitting looking at an open door and we both sensed she was about to make a crawl for it and she announced "Grace is feeling crawlish", which seemed to sum up the situation fairly well.

Friday, April 23, 2010

eggplant - flop

I had nursed some eggplant seeds into germinating, they require warmth above room temperature, so I had to rig up a source of heat, eventually up they came, but when I checked on them today, they had all gone flop. My best guess is that I didn't give them light soon enough.

However, if I sow some more seeds again this weekend, I think they have a chance of being mature enough for planting out when the weather is warm enough, I'd planned on a 2nd and possibly 3rd sowing anyway, as it's hard to predict exactly when the weather is going to be warm and when the first frost will come.

If it doesn't work out, maybe I'll hit a local nursery or garden centre and see if they have any varieties that might work in our garden.

I'm also debating whether to chance a first sowing of beans soon, it may be too cool, but you get so many in a packet, that if it fails, it's no big deal. Carrots are also high on my mental to do list for getting in the ground.